April 25, 2006

Fizzle-pop-bang

So it has been about a week, I realize that. I have been feeling a bit overwhelmed the past month- work, school, teaching, planning party's, selling the house....And despite the blog's therapeutic magic I haven't found time to squeeze it in to my day. I have felt overwhelmingly empty the past few days... Yearning to be somewhere else, be someone else....
You know those weeks when you just feel empty? Like the feeling that you are starving, but you are so hungry you can't decide what it is that you want to eat? That is how I have felt for a few weeks now- Hungry for something that I can't quite put my finger on- maybe it is spiritual, maybe it is material. I just don't know. The not knowing is the hardest part. Fighting with myself that I am fine, I have more than enough and have so many things to make me smile- I know this and then I just get frustrated that I still feel empty...
I decided that I needed to knit. That maybe creating something was really what I needed to feel better. I started a sweet little baby sweater using so fabulously soft Debbie Bliss yarn that my FSP Becky gave me. The sweater is for my cousin's baby that is on the way. I am loving the way the yarn feels in my hands, the ease of the pattern and the sound of the needles clicking and I go back and forth- I am even *gasp* enjoying purling. Weird, I know.

One of the other reasons that I have failed to blog for the past few days is because of the rain "Blame it on the rain" (oh -god, you know the song). But really. Our roof in the computer room sprung a leak and the drip positioned itself conveniently over the monitor. Hence the title of this post: fizzle-pop-bang. We weren't home when the whole thing happened, but I imagine the monitor just smoking and sparking and then grasping its last breath of electricity and then dying. So I can't blog with out a monitor- and well, I feel guilty about blogging at work (which I am doing now).

so there it is- just a little update. I will post pictures soon- oh, and by the way I have some doozies from my best friends Roller-Rama Birthday party last Friday night.
Soon Billy. Soon (does anyone else remember this line from a children's book? My mom used to read it to me all the time and the line became a mantra in the house when I really wanted something to happen- now darn it).

8 comments:

Stacie said...

the brake light through the wet windsheild is too beautiful. It captures that sad, wet, lonesome feeling of driving in the rain... Feel better, this too shall pass...

Anonymous said...

ugh. Now I have not-Milli-Vanilli stuck in my head going 'round and 'round.

Like a record, baby...

...right round baby right round...

shit.

Anonymous said...

Sorry to hear that you're in a rut. I know the feeling well. I hope a little sunshine, some adorable baby knits, and a repaired computer monitor will drive your blues away.

Becky said...

Feel better soon. I hope it felt good to share. A fizzled monitor is good enough reason not to blog.

Unknown said...

I hope that you are feeling better very soon! I hope that the baby sweater is helping you get out of your rut!! Thanks for getting that song stuck in my head!!

angela said...

oh the song....
glad you posted, feel good soon :)

Princessdeia said...

I have ruts too - not sure if I will even love purling though

kat said...

why does it seem like everyone is going through this right now? something is in the stars!